Sunday, November 29, 2009

Two Years ... Seriously ?

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Aaron Jr and his amazing eyes at the cemetery.
It has now been two years since Aaron passed away. I will say it again... time is a strange thing. It feels like it was just yesterday that we lost Aaron, but it also feels like it has been an eternity since we have seen him. Time is strange indeed.






We all met at the cemetery again this year. Thanks to Sue and Steve for bringing the balloons. I had been trying to figure out how many balloons to do this year. So far at the funeral and last year, there was no rhyme or reason to the number of balloons we released, but I have been wanting to settle on a number so that we could have a meaning behind it... so I asked them to get 30 red and white balloons... one for each year that Aaron lived. That is how many we will do each year.




Once again... sending our hearts to heaven...

I asked that once the balloons were released for everyone to join in singing 'God Be With You Til We Meet Again'. So as we watched the balloons disappear, we were singing that song. I couldn't sing all of it because it was too overwhelming, but it is a very special song.
After the balloons were out of sight, I asked Aaron's brother Steve to offer a family prayer. It was a beautiful prayer and it brought me to tears.



After the prayer, I told everyone about something I wanted to do. I had bought a bag of sunflower seeds. When Aaron was here with us, he ate sunflower seeds all the time. He always had a bag in the car with us and would eat them whenever we were driving. He would also eat them when he was working in the shop on furniture. Aaron Jr also loved them, but he couldn't shell them in his mouth like Aaron did... so Aaron would shell them and then hand the seed back to Aaron Jr. So much work for just a little seed.


Top: Aaron Jr scattering sunflower seeds.
Bottom: Aaron Jr showing off the gifts that Sadie made for us. Ornaments for the tree with photos in them. Photos of Aaron with Aaron Jr and photo of Aaron with me. We love them. Thank you Sadie. She also made a necklace one for me.


Anyhow, ever since Aaron passed away, whenever Aaron Jr sees sunflower seeds, he always says, 'Daddy's'. So, I know it is a true memory of his. He doesn't have many specific memories like that, so I thought it would be fun to start a tradition of putting sunflower seeds on his grave. So I handed some out to all the kids and they put them on the headstone, I scattered some on the grass where he is buried, and Aaron Jr scattered some on the grass on the other side of the headstone. It was a special thing we can do each year to celebrate Aaron Jr's memories of Aaron.






Leslie and Aaron Jr.

It has been a pretty emotional month for me for loads of reasons, not the least of those being the anniversary of Aaron's death. There is just a feeling to this month that brings emotions now. It is a month to be grateful and a month for us to remember. I have to admit, I am so grateful for the comfort and peace that the Lord continues to bring to us as we continue to try to move forward in life while remembering Aaron. We hope and pray that all of Aaron's family and friends are also accepting the peace and comfort that the Lord offers to us if we are willing to accept it. I haven't always been willing to accept it, but I am learning each day to be better about that.
I want to thank everyone who came to join us in remembering. We appreciate it.
We miss Aaron. His life is one to be celebrated and we will continue to do so...
We love you Aaron / Daddy...

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14 comments:

The Kimball Herd said...

As always we are thinking of you and of him...I love the sunflower seeds..maybe if we are lucky some will take root and bloom I am sure the graveyard staff would just love that. Have peace and joy moving into the new year and holidays.

Love you both.

Autumn and fam

Joann said...

Leslie, you are wonderful! I hope you have a fun day celebrating Aaron Jr. birthday (today, right?) I respect you in so many ways! Love you!

LL said...

Wow, I can't believe it's been two years.
I think of you so often~love the tradition of the balloons and sunflower seed. So sweet!

Jen said...

I was thinking of you. It has been about 15 1/2 months for me and I couldn't agree more. In some ways it feels like it was just yesterday that Shawn passed away. I remember every detail of that day. Then in another way it feels like an eternity since the last time I saw Shawn or had his arms around me. So many feelings all rolled into one.

I think your tradition of balloons is awesome and I love the sunflower tradition as well. I'm sure Aaron was smiling down on you all.

You are doing great! Thinking about you.

partypatt said...

Of all the blogs I read, yours is the one that brings me to tears nearly every time I read it. I'm glad you are receiving comfort and learning acceptance concerning Aaron's death. May God be with you and Aaron Jr. always. Stay strong. You are an amazing example to this gramma!

Kristi said...

I wish we could have been there. We thought of you guys though. Our hearts broke again thinking about your huge loss. We love you guys. Hugs.

Emily said...

I just found your blog today, it had brought tears to my eyes in just about every post. You are such an inspiration to me!

Allred Mom said...

Leslie...
Sounds like a beautiful day of remembrance at the cemetary. Also, what a great tradition for Aaron Jr to have of placing sunflower seeds on his daddy's resting spot.
May his memories stay alive in each of your hearts.

Rhitzclan said...

Thinking of you and Aaron Jr. I'll phone you tomorrow. How was his 4th birthday? Miss you!

Lisa Carter said...

You are such a great Mother and a wonderful example to all of those around you. I have thought so much of you this month especially. I hope all is well. Love ya, Lisa

AlanaBD said...

Beautiful post, Leslie. Wonderful new memories you have created for the anniversary. I remember telling me you were struggling with the balloon count. I think that's a great idea. I love you!

Alana

Seivert/Webb Family said...

God bless you and little Aaron, we sang that song at my brother's mission farewell, at the airport; before he boarded a plane to Hungary, and it was emotional,then again, almost six years ago, when my Dad passed; very unexpectedly, it's a hard song to this day to hear or sing without a lump in my throat.

My Dad passed on a Tuesday, that Sunday on "Music and the spoken word" it was said that "sorrow is our common lot" and that we are designed by our creator to bear the weight of our trials. It's been six years and my Mother is still heart broken. Time is certainly a funny thing.

You're doing your best putting one foot in front of the other and God will bless you for your efforts.

Keep up the good work.
Catherine

Kate, Alek, Hank, and Cash (RIP RED) said...

Been thinking of you....beautiful tribute to Aaron on that day...
Kate and Alek

Anonymous said...

Beautiful, Leslie.

Love,

Jane