Monday, September 29, 2008

Ten Months...

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My brother Robert, his wife Teresa, and their son Zach came down this evening. They took us out to dinner then we went to play at the park. Here are a few photos. Thanks Robert and Teresa and Zach. We had a great time.

After they left, Aaron Jr. found the Johnny Jump Up and wanted to play in it. So, I hooked it up, put him in, and he had a blast. We don't have any door jams in any open spaces in our house, so when we first got it, Aaron found a 'stud' in the ceiling and put this bike hanger in the ceiling to hang it from. It always worked really well. This is the first time it has been used since Aaron passed away. Aaron Jr. enjoyed himself... even though he is getting a little too big for it.

This is Aaron's friend Dan, his girlfriend Liz and her daughter Ashlynn. The past few years around this time of year, Aaron and Dan would go up to a beautiful canyon in Mapleton. They would take their horses, camp out, then go horseback riding through the beautiful mountains with trees full of changing leaves.
Yesterday, Dan called to see if Aaron Jr. and I wanted to join them up in that canyon to sit around their campfire and roast marshmallows. Dan had called and asked my brother in law John if they could bring Shayla (she was Aaron's horse) with them. So, they had Shayla and Abby (Dan's horse) with them. Aaron Jr. knew who Shayla was and kept calling her 'Daddy's horse'.
It was a really nice evening. The whole drive down there, I just kept wishing that I was sitting in the passenger seat with Aaron driving to go and meet them.
It was SO nice of them to invite us. I am so glad we went and it was nice to sit and talk about Aaron and also talk about their trips to go horseback riding up there.
Thank you Dan and Liz and Ashlynn. We had a great time.

This is a photo that Dan took of Aaron a couple of years ago on one of their trips to that canyon. Thanks Dan. I love this photo of Aaron and Shayla.

The fact that it has been ten months since Aaron passed away is a surreal feeling for me. I still miss Aaron as much as ever and my heart still aches with loneliness and sorrow wishing he were here with me. Each month that passes doesn't necessarily make me feel more healed... it is just time. The healing has come from the love and support of others and also from the healing power of the atonement of Jesus Christ. I still feel like I have a long way to go, but I am so grateful for the Savior and for the understanding He has of my own individual pain. He knows it, because He suffered it. 'Surely he hath borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows...' -Isaiah 53:4
'...the Redeemer was anointed to bind up the broken-hearted...' -Doctrine and Covenants 138:42
I am not alone in this. None of us are alone in anything that we suffer. No matter how excruciating the loneliness feels at times, I am not alone.

Always missing you, Aaron. I love you...

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Leslie said...


dani said...

you are so right about NEVER being alone, leslie;)

Kristi said...

Hurry up and get here!

Jennifer Miller said...

I want a Johnny Jump Up!!! (for myself of course) :o)

Jennifer Miller said...

I want a Johnny Jump Up!!! (for myself of course) :o)

Anonymous said...

Hi Leslie, I've been away for a couple of weeks and am just checking in to say hi and send you my love.

I love the pics of little Aaron - what a face!!


Joann said...

Okay, where do I start? So many great pictures. That Johnny Jump-up CRACKS ME UP!!! I can't believe he still fits in it! That was so great of Dan and Liz to invite you and little Aaron up to that beautiful canyon. I agree with you on the picture of Aaron riding Shayla...AWESOME!

Sheye Rosemeyer said...

No you are not alone Leslie. I never forget you and Aaron (who is getting SO big).. Always with you across the miles.
Love Sheye x

Momza said...

What we would do without True Friends?!

Tabitha said...

Thinking of you Leslie!

K and K and kids said...

Love the pictures! Aaron Jr. is getting so big. Man...I need to come for a visit. Love the jumper pictures. Could he get out by himself? Good for containment. Love ya, Les!

Jyl said...

Adorable pictures!

LL said...

Leslie I have been so bad about leaving comments. I made the mistake of putting all my favorite blogs on bloglines. So, I read them all, just don't always comment.
I still think of you daily. Always love when you post so I can hear what you've been doing and HOW you're doing.
I can't believe it's been 10 months. WOW.
You've handled things beautifully, and I know you'll continue to grow more and more each day. You're simply amazing.
thinking of you.

Amanda Sue said...

That is a cute picture of you and Aaron Jr. I can't believe how big he has gotten, so stinking cute! I am happy you two are still getting to have fun experiences like this. Thank heavens for good friends! :)

Sue xx said...

I followed one of your comments from Sheye's blog. I am so glad you have wonderful friends that help you keep Aaron's memory alive. Oh and you don't give yourself enough credit you have a gorgeous blog and you write so beautifully.
Sue xx